When it comes to finding the perfect assisted living community for your loved one, knowing what to look for and ask on a tour can make a big difference when it comes to achieving complete peace of mind and knowing you’ve made the right choice. Tamara Jones, Certified Senior Advisor at Care Patrol, has a wealth of experience in helping families prepare for the hassle-free retirement of their dreams in advance of visiting potential options.
From assessing your loved ones personal health needs and understanding their financial situation, including benefits they might qualify for, to knowing what types of activities they’ll enjoy in a vibrant social setting, there’s a lot to think about ahead of making that next step.
Video Transcript
Hi everyone, and welcome to another episode of Senior Living Live. My name is Mary Cate Spires, and we are in Marlton, New Jersey this week at Arbor Terrace Marlton. And we are so lucky to be joined by one of their fantastic partners, Tamara Johns, with Care Patrol. Thank you so much for joining me today.
Thank you so much, Mary Cate. Thanks for having me.
And we have a really exciting topic. Highly recommend taking some notes if you can on this guy, and I definitely wanna talk about how Care Patrol helps in this process as well, but we're gonna be talking about touring assisted living and what that looks like, what you should ask. Everything no one knows what to do.
Sure.
What to Know Before You Tour a Senior Living Community
So let's dive into it. So, you know, we have a senior, we have a loved one, they've decided it's probably time to start looking for senior living, assisted living communities. What's the first step before, you know, actually even going on the tour?
Sometimes residents are looking to move into assisted living in situations that are not a crisis. They may be tired of maintaining household, doing laundry, cooking, cleaning, as many of us are. They also might feel isolated in their home and are looking for the social engagement that an assisted living community can provide.
Absolutely.
But oftentimes, it's because the person is in a crisis situation. And, you know, what's challenging is that families usually don't have all of the information that they need in order to make a decision about assisted living. This can be a stressful time in a resident's life and for the family. The family may notice that there's spoiled food in the refrigerator, that they're missing doses of medication, that they're poor housekeeping, poor hygiene, confusion. Sometimes there's something that's tragic that's happened. There's an event that motivates a family to start looking into assisted living communities immediately. These are stressful times, and families are not prepared with all of the information that they need to make the appropriate decision. It's a complex decision to make and can be really overwhelming, and most families don't even know where to start.
Right. It really is. And I've been in that same situation, even working in senior living, realizing it's that time. And the first thing you ask is, what do I do first?
Yes.
What what should they do first?
Yeah. So the first thing to do is to really assess their own situation. Family members and the senior should talk about what's really happening. And sometimes it's difficult to have those honest conversations about the things that you see. Especially for a parent or loved one who has always been a person that's in charge of their life and sometimes in charge of your life. It's important though to have those conversations and to get everybody on the same page and understand the need to get that resident to a safe place. It's also important to understand your loved one's financial situation, and what their resources are to pay the monthly fee needed for assisted living.
Right.
Sometimes those conversations can be hard to have as well because your parents, I know mine, were very independent. And maybe they have kept that information private. But it's really important to get that information so that you know what your budget is to pay for care.
Of course.
And of course, geographic preference. You need to know and decide what area you're looking in so that you can kind of identify which communities are located in that area. We always recommend that the community be located in a place that's easily accessible for someone who is going to be able to visit on a regular basis. And then also, plan to tour the communities. There is nothing that can substitute. There's no information online that can substitute a personal visit to a community where you have a chance to meet with community staff, meet residents, see the programs that are happening, see apartments and common area spaces to really get a feel for the community and how it might be a good fit for your loved one.
Absolutely. And, you know, obviously, people are very busy. Lots is going on, on top of a very stressful situation.
Yes.
How many communities would you typically recommend to, let's say there's a ton in the area. How many would you recommend kinda narrowing it down to tour?
Yeah. So typically, we recommend touring three communities that are appropriate. No more than four. I mean, if you really are looking at all the important factors, your budget, social needs, care needs, geographical preference, you can probably find three to four communities that are the best options for your loved one.
Yeah. So once they've narrowed it down, we've decided who we're gonna go tour, does it make more sense in your opinion, to pick up the phone and schedule a tour or just walk in?
I've had so many clients who just wanted to walk in, and we don't really recommend that because you want to first of all, make sure that someone's available to give you the tour and and walk around, but you can't just walk in because the assisted living community is the home of the residents who live there. So it's best to schedule a tour. And that way you'll have the full attention of the person who's going to give you all of the information that you need to know about the community and take you around and introduce you to people who work and live there.
Discover More During Your Tour
Yeah. Great advice. And I know things are always happening, so it's good to plan for sure. You know, when the tour, who should be on that tour?
Anyone who is involved in the decision making of where your loved one is going to live should probably benefit from being on that tour. It's difficult to describe and convey all of the information that you receive while on the tour to people who are involved in the decision when they haven't seen it.
Right.
So, you can invite even if it's friends who are close to your loved one and they are part of that decision making process, it would be greatly helpful if they were there.
Yeah. Absolutely. You talked about a little bit, before, but while you're taking this tour, who is it important to make sure that you talk to and you see during that experience?
It's great if you can talk to some directors on the team. Of course, you're going to meet with a community sales director, who will lead the tour. But if you can meet the executive director, if you have concerns about medication or specific care needs, you may benefit from talking to a wellness director. Of course, speaking to some other residents can be helpful as well because they can give you insights as to what it's like to actually live in the community. And I always recommend speaking to families who are in the community visiting their loved ones to get an idea of what their experience has been. Not just living there, but also the transition from home to the community and how they were able to successfully navigate that.
Absolutely. They've already been through it.
Exactly.
Alright. The meaty, part of this. What are some important questions to make sure we get answered on our tour?
There are so many questions to ask and it's really important that people get all of their questions asked. I would start with, you know, once you have a sit down, and typically there's a meeting where you get to hear about the community but also ask questions. And you'll be able to ask questions while you walk around after that to see the building. But I would start with questions related to the safety of your loved one. So for example, staffing. You might want to ask what the staffing ratios look like. How many residents are in the building? What staff members are in the building? Is there a nurse on staff? What hours is a nurse in the community? What kind of training does the staff get? Oftentimes, there's training monthly and sometimes more often that's where the community requires of its staff to make sure that they're up to date with giving the best care, particularly for dementia training.
Absolutely.
What kind of visiting physicians come into the community? There are probably going to be geriatricians, people who specialize in the care of older adults. There may be a podiatrist. There may be an audiologist. There's typically a therapy team either working in the community full-time or coming in to see their patients. And then lab work and x-rays can also be a very convenient service to have come into the community. The reason it's important to possibly consider switching from your primary care physician out in the community to ones that come into the assisted living community is for convenience. Usually, the staff has a very close relationship with those doctors and can reach out to them overnight or on the weekends just in case there's a need for questions about prescriptions or getting prescriptions written, for example. It just makes it so much more convenient too for the families to not have to take the resident out of the community to go to appointments, that they can actually be seen typically right in their own apartment. While you're walking around the community, you'll also want to see the different apartment sizes and styles.
Okay.
You need to understand what size would be important and most comfortable for your loved one. We really recommend that our clients not look at apartments in the way that they would look for a house or a condo outside of assisted living because the whole community is their home. So understanding that you don't want to have someone live in a space where they feel that they never need to leave because it's all the space they need. Truly, the idea is for them to be engaged in the community. And so if you're looking at spaces, you want to make sure that it's comfortable for them, but they don't need to be in the largest space possible. And then, of course, there's social interaction and engagement. And, you know, programming is critically important. We find that when seniors are engaged with stimulation and socialization with their peers that they tend to thrive and it correlates with longevity. And so it's really important to look at the activity calendar to see what's happening in the community, maybe even observe some activities that are happening while you're there. Oftentimes, it's good to tour maybe after breakfast or after lunch while activities and programs are happening. You might wanna ask if there are visiting professionals who come in for entertainment and whether or not they take residents out on visits to other places for socialization engagement as well. And speaking of taking residents out, they may go to shopping, other cultural events, restaurants, but also ask if they take residents out to doctor appointments. Oftentimes, they will have certain designated days for transportation specifically to take people to the doctor, which can be very convenient for families. You may need to meet them there, but at least your loved one will have either wheelchair transport or a vehicle to take them to the doctor. And then, of course, what's most important to seniors is food.
Yep.
And food, having meals and good food is a big part of what's important to older adults. And you'll want to ask, are the meal times scheduled during the day, or is there all-day dining? How are meals prepared? How is it served? Is it restaurant-style? Are they reading off of a menu? What if your loved one is not able to read the menu and comprehend what's on it to make a choice? Do they have open seating or is it assigned seating? And then, of course, does the community accommodate specialized diets such as vegetarian diets, diets for certain allergies, cardiac diets, renal, diabetic diets, and then pureed, and mechanically chopped foods. Those are important to know. You know, if your loved one moves into a community, communication with the community is important. So you'll want to know who your point of contact would be. Is that someone who is involved in your loved one's day-to-day life? Would it be someone on the nursing staff or would it be another director in the community? Is there a regular communication? Like, is there someone that you would email or do you receive emails? Once your loved one moves in, how often are they assessed for changes in their care needs? If your loved one is complaining that they never do anything in the assisted living, which you might hear, who is it that you can speak to to find out what they actually have participated in during the day or during the week. And then there's visitation. Most communities want families to be involved because it's a community, and they have certain visitation policies. Usually, you can come in and out of an assisted living community twenty-four hours a day, but you need to know how to get in during those times when the doors are locked. You also want to know what kind of engagement they have with families. Oftentimes, there are events planned especially for families to join in. You wanna know if you can participate in an activity that your loved one is doing as part of their regular program. Can you join in on an outing to a sporting event or to a cultural event? All of those things are important for you to know how involved you can be with your loved one in this experience in assisted living.
Yeah. Absolutely.
One of the most important things to consider, when you're looking in assisted living communities is what levels of care can they handle. So you know what's going on, and you know what your loved one needs, in terms of personal care, whether it's any of the activities of daily living, like bathing, dressing, grooming, toileting, mobility, medication management, all of those things to keep them safe and healthy.
And different communities will handle different levels of care. So you wanna understand what their maximum level of care would be. Do they do medication management? Do they, if your loved one is a diabetic, can they handle sliding-scale insulin management? Do they do any wound care? Do they assist with mobility? Do they assist with transfers? Many communities have traditional assisted living, but they also have a memory care neighborhood. And it's important to know that, particularly if you feel that your loved one may need memory care in the future. And so it's important to to learn from the community when they would decide that a resident needs to move from regular assisted living into their memory care neighborhood. How is that determined? How do they communicate that to the family? So care is extremely important, of course.
What’s Next: Key Takeaways
Of course. Absolutely. Oh, my goodness. That was so much great information. I'm about to let you go. I promise. But so we have a tour. Maybe we're even going for a retour. What do you suggest when the decision makers get home and they kinda try to start taking in all this information. What's the easiest way to start sorting through all of it?
That is such a complicated situation when families get home because typically on tours, they have taken in so much information. So first of all, I wouldn't recommend visiting more than three communities in one day. Because it's difficult to remember everything you heard and saw during that time. But I would say definitely make a list of all of the things that are priorities for you, your family, and your loved one. And then really just check off which communities offer those. You know, I would say that key things, of course, would be levels of care and whether or not you felt that the community was vibrant in terms of their activities and programming. And then other factors are location and cost. I think that once you have found a community that kind of checks all of the boxes that are important to you, it's really about gut feel. Mhmm. You know, where do you think it's a good fit for your loved one? It's no different than touring college campuses. You know, it's where do you think it's a good fit. And, you know, if you've already narrowed down which ones offer the services that will keep your loved one safe, cared for, and living a vibrant life. One of the things that's important, I think, is for families to know that when you have found the right community a great fit, it is so exciting to see how these older adults really thrive, and they do. And that's what we see all over the country.
Oh, yes. I agree for sure. That's incredible. Well, Tamara, thank you so much. This is fantastic. Sure. If any of our listeners are interested in learning more about Care Patrol and what you all do to help through this journey, what's the easiest way for them to get in touch?
Sure. You can reach out to us on carepatrol.com. We have an intake form, and it will direct you to one of our two hundred and twenty locations around the country.
So you'll be covered if you need anything.
Yes. Absolutely.
Perfect. Well, I know you're very busy, so thank you so much for taking your time.
Thank you so much for having me. I enjoyed it.
Perfect. Alright, everyone. That is the end of this episode. If you're interested in more information like this and more resources on senior living, you can go to seniorlivinglive.com. And for now, we'll see you later. Bye now.
